I'm Lauren. An eighteen year-old aspiring actress living in central New Jersey.

Posts tagged "ugh"

Coming back to California is so bitter sweet every time because it actually makes me sad that I live where I live.

My mind

  • why do people find Lana Del Ray attractive in the slightest, she just isn’t
  • i’m annoyed with myself for being constantly annoyed with everyone around me
  • skins, can i quit school and just watch skins is that a feasible plan for the rest of my life or
  • someone needs to act like they fucking care about me at all or else i might explode
  • why do i try at anything, it never works out 
  • everyone around me is either in a relationship, just got out of one, friends with benefits with someone, “talking” to someone, hook-up buddies with someone, and here i am, an 18 year old who has never had a boyfriend and has only had one kiss in her entire lifetime that will always be mocked
  • i have friends who act like idiots either for attention or just out of boredom, friends who have too much shit going on in their lives to pay attention to my shit, and friends who pretend to care about me and don’t actually care about me at all
  • my parents find fault in literally almost anything i do nowadays
  • my fucking math teacher shouldn’t have ever become a math teacher
  • i don’t know what the hell i want to do with my life even though i’ve applied to all my schools declaring a musical theatre major which i have no intention of pursuing 
  • the most attention i get from males are my dogs jumping on me when i come home 
  • i know i can do much better at everything in my life but choose not to

The only thing keeping me from snapping right now is listening to Live John Mayer on Spotify. 

I need to see him live. I absolutely need to. There is no question. 

There’s nothing that makes me feel worse than when I give a bad performance and the director doesn’t hide the fact they’re disappointed.

I just ate a gigantic bowl of Mint Chocolate Chip ice cream and I didn’t even really want it at all. Guys, this is why I’m CHUBBY.

I’m so terrified of playing this role. It terrifies me because I feel as though I’m tragically unfunny. I feel like there are tons of other people that would be perfect in it other than me and I think that will always hang over my head.

I think the biggest compliment I could ever be given would be, “Your voice sounds kind of like Amy Winehouse”. 

Ugh when it comes to you I’m extremely conflicted and I never know why. I just need someone to makes decisions for me. My indecisiveness will be the death of me one day.

I was trying to be a good sport about this whole Sandy thing on my birthday, just like the surprise snow storm on my birthday last year, but it sucks. My dad went to four different malls to try and get me an apple laptop and they were all closed. And it’s a pretty sure thing we’re gonna lose power tonight. Looks like tomato soup on the stove for the 2nd time on my birthday. This honestly sucks so much.

Seeing my mom truly sad makes me sadder than I’ve ever been before. A type of sad I’ve never had to deal with and because of that, don’t know how to deal with. And I don’t like it at all because bursting into tears at inconvenient moments of my day doesn’t work for me. At all. 

Ugh, I don’t know what’s wrong with me. All I want to do all day is sleep, eat Ocean Spray gummy snacks, and watch How I Met Your Mother. I’m cranky for no reason, I don’t want to do anything, and I always want to be alone. Is there something wrong with me? Because there’s a part of me hoping there is so I can know I’m not THIS obnoxious.

I’ve been watching all the seasons available on Netflix of Keeping Up with the Kardashians and for some reason it randomly signed me out and I don’t know my brother’s Netflix password. *Tear*